These few days have been terrible.The temperature gets so high, tears well up in my eyes. Sometimes, when i meet up with my girls, i feel that everything even time has come to a standstill.It's so difficult to make people understand what you'r going through hence i've given up that idea a long long time. But naively, i still wanna know out there if there's even someone who can totally understand you and not empathise your situation. They don't go through the pain, sweat, exhaustion and stress you handle with everyday so how do they know? It gets so tired to catch up sometimes but i always want to because i know these people are worth it.
"There's a reason why some people in the past do not make it to your future."
Hence i've gave up trying to keep people in my life. Those that are still around are those that i really cherish and understands me inside out.
Culinary and SSM is taking its toll on me. Students who have undergone these two modules would understand. Even now when i hear some engine students or business students saying :" i've got school at 9 to 4 ( with a kick ass 2 hours break) know??" Then i will be thinking, you've not gone through anything yet.Even to the extent of sometimes, i feel that once i've gone through all of these i will be able to withstand anything. Give me the shoutings, the accusations, the "breathe down your neck" intimidations and i still will succumb this stupid module.
This is the f-ing third time i cut my finger while doing knifeskills. F-ed up pairing knife.
I'm grounded. But i don't give a damn really. Its gets so empty sometimes, i feel like i have no home. I really want to recover from all these sickness but i need time and i have none of that. I did my culi practical test cooking the main course with a high fever, went through bartending at SSM with a terrible flu and a bad fever that does not subside. Being very stubborn, i went for reggae and i sweat while having that stupid fever and flu.
I think i deserve some scolding for not knowing how to take care of myself. But seriously, i don't care anymore.
Sy :" Ting its not that the people around you are childish, it's just that you are too mature for them to understand."
" Don't reach to the extent that you feel numb with the pain."
No, i've reached that point already. I'm way pass it. I'm just waiting to handle what's next.
Even last night , when i was on the bus way home with the seniors Joey, Meichin and Serene. the issue bout maturity was brought up. The way you talk, handle things also play a part in your maturity level.
I never knew that. I seriously never knew that the way you talk shows how mature you are.
I need time to understand people around me. But sometimes, the one thing that makes me happy is that i do not feel the age gap when i hang out with my lockers (: Maybe because we are all of the same age ?(Flo, you are like 18 even though you are 19 (: )
The number doesn't seems to matter anymore, but the problem i guess lies in me.I've gone so far ahead, i didn't realize that there's no one there with me. They are all together at the back with the same mentality.How i wish i could turn back time and be someone who was so happy. But i guess, once you've taken a step forward or made a decision there's no turning back.
Culinary and SSM is taking its toll on me. Students who have undergone these two modules would understand. Even now when i hear some engine students or business students saying :" i've got school at 9 to 4 ( with a kick ass 2 hours break) know??" Then i will be thinking, you've not gone through anything yet.Even to the extent of sometimes, i feel that once i've gone through all of these i will be able to withstand anything. Give me the shoutings, the accusations, the "breathe down your neck" intimidations and i still will succumb this stupid module.
This is the f-ing third time i cut my finger while doing knifeskills. F-ed up pairing knife.
I'm grounded. But i don't give a damn really. Its gets so empty sometimes, i feel like i have no home. I really want to recover from all these sickness but i need time and i have none of that. I did my culi practical test cooking the main course with a high fever, went through bartending at SSM with a terrible flu and a bad fever that does not subside. Being very stubborn, i went for reggae and i sweat while having that stupid fever and flu.
I think i deserve some scolding for not knowing how to take care of myself. But seriously, i don't care anymore.
Something that kept me thinking after Sunday
Sy :" Ting its not that the people around you are childish, it's just that you are too mature for them to understand."
" Don't reach to the extent that you feel numb with the pain."
No, i've reached that point already. I'm way pass it. I'm just waiting to handle what's next.
Even last night , when i was on the bus way home with the seniors Joey, Meichin and Serene. the issue bout maturity was brought up. The way you talk, handle things also play a part in your maturity level.
I never knew that. I seriously never knew that the way you talk shows how mature you are.
wow
I never see that coming, i guess i've undergone too much changes in a year that i don't even feel like i'm eighteen years old at all.
I never see that coming, i guess i've undergone too much changes in a year that i don't even feel like i'm eighteen years old at all.
I need time to understand people around me. But sometimes, the one thing that makes me happy is that i do not feel the age gap when i hang out with my lockers (: Maybe because we are all of the same age ?(Flo, you are like 18 even though you are 19 (: )
The number doesn't seems to matter anymore, but the problem i guess lies in me.I've gone so far ahead, i didn't realize that there's no one there with me. They are all together at the back with the same mentality.How i wish i could turn back time and be someone who was so happy. But i guess, once you've taken a step forward or made a decision there's no turning back.
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